How to Resist Peer Pressure: Strategies for Teens

Mix-and-match peer pressure refusal strategies to share with your teen:

It can happen before you know it: One minute your child is hanging out with friends, the next she ise doing something completely out of character—something she knows is wrong, such as drinking, smoking, or doing drugs—and it's all because of peer pressure. 

Peer pressure is a problem as old as time. While it affects people of all ages, children (especially teenagers) are more susceptible to the powers of group persuasion, largely because they have not yet developed the skills to refuse it. 

Teaching your child peer pressure refusal skills is an important first step in helping him make the right choices, even when others around him aren't doing the same. 

Occasionally one strategy isn’t enough to turn away peer pressure. In such a case, your child may have to use multiple strategies to avoid a dangerous situation.    

Here are five peer pressure refusal strategies that your teen can mix and match to help her make healthy choices:

1. Suggest a Better Idea

Sometimes all it takes is one good idea to get you off the hook. If a friend suggests doing something that you know is wrong, offer an alternate activity that will appeal to him.

For example, if your friend asks you to climb onto the school roof with him because he’s bored, suggest heading to the basketball courts for a game instead. If your friend wants to hang out in a place where you know there will be alcohol, invite her to your house to eat pizza and play video games. Often, people will take the opportunity to do the right thing if they are given the chance. The trick, of course, is to make the new idea interesting. You wouldn’t want to suggest that your friend help you do your chores instead of going to a party.

2. Ignore

Ignoring can be a great strategy, especially when it comes to kids you don’t know well. When someone is trying to pressure you into an unsafe or unwanted activity, you don’t owe that person an explanation for why you don’t want to participate. In fact, if you try to explain yourself the other person may take it as an invitation to try to convince you otherwise. Ignore them. Ignore them and walk away. Or perhaps ignore and suggest a better idea. 

Another great place to use ‘ignore’ is in the classroom. For example, if a student is trying to engage you in conversation while the teacher is talking, ignoring and pretending that you didn’t hear that student can be an effective way to keep out of trouble.